Emotions from Romantic Notions

Ok – I’m a Leo. You can hold your own belief systems regarding the various zodiacs. You have right to your own beliefs. As I have said previously, with age has come the realization that I know less than I ever thought I could know, and the beliefs I hold are not founded on the firm foundations that I may have thought that they were in my youth. I now realize that many people could hold answers that I never before thought possible. Their versions of reality and attempts to make sense of all this called life are no less valid than mine. However, from a strictly personal space – I can affirm, without hesitation, that I am a Leo! My loyalty, protectiveness, attention and affection is unconditionally bestowed on those I choose. Being unconditionally, the existence and degree of these connections are not degraded by time. However, there is a price to pay. As a Leo, I require some measure of recognition and acknowledgement of this unconditional gift. This is my flaw as a Leo. You cannot be unconditional and have a price to pay at the same time. It is a failure I struggle with, but I am heartened by the scene referred to here. Maybe, you can have both.

Oh wait … forgot – that’s Richard Gere, not me. What was I thinking – LOL. Yep – need to recalibrate my Leo.

Image: https://images.app.goo.gl/6U9SgCkxK

Under general circumstances and mostly universal terms, I detest and abhor conspiracy theories. However, I have personal knowledge of the following “all too convenient coincidence”; therefore, I feel empowered to make the following assertion….

Postulation – Apple, and quite possibly, every other similar service available today, has a strategic alliance with various participants in the anti-depressant pharmaceutical industry whose objective is to create a symbiotic financial relationship whereby one party creates a demand for the supply of the other party.

Data Set and Substantiation – On a recent evening at home alone – and yes, it was a Friday evening – I wanted to chill out with some audio pleasure. Having made the proper request, I was subsequently regaled with the following stream of soul-crushing, lonely-heart bleeding, spirit wrenching lyrical tidbits:

Nights are Forever Without You – England Dan and John Ford Coley

Summer Breeze – Seals and Crofts

If You Leave Me Know – Chicago

How Much I Feel – Ambrosia

Operator – Jim Croce

Just Remember I Love You – Firefall

Amie – Pure Prairie League

I Go Crazy – Paul Davis

Everything I Own – Bread

Conclusive Summary – There exists a subliminal enticement by Apple resulting in the need for mood altering chemical treatment through the ingestion of industry-led artificially price-inflated pharmaceuticals. The only things missing from the above are a written prescription, directions to the nearest pharmacy and a asterisked, small print note stating that side effects may include uncontrollable anal bleeding.

I could see Publix becoming the next dating destination hotbed 😂😂. Casual introductions in the deli section, small talk going through produce, all the “where have you traveled to” question in the ethnic/international food aisles, how many kids do you have discussion in the personal hygiene section, “maybe I could cook for you sometime” at the meat/poultry coolers, random flirting on the wine aisle … if you make it together all the way to the dairy section – CONNECTION!! 😂😂🤣🤣🤣

https://images.app.goo.gl/3nYWQSB7UQzog7HEA

As I find myself single and now at 55 years of age, the challenges of the convergence of these two realities is hitting home. There are numerous challenges that arise from such a condition — adjusting recipes to cook for one when all you know is how to cook for Napoleon’s Army on the march to Russia; rationalizing day-drinking when alone (I admit, I have overcome this one with little effort and a huge “Fuck You” to any social stigma that others may place on the habit); adjusting to sleeping through Boxer farts in the middle of the night and waking up to Boxer breath on your face in the morning (all-in-all, this one, on the whole, isn’t really that bad); over-coming the feeling of shame when there are no seats left to eat at the bar and you have to ask for a table for one; and, at times, mastering the art of auto-erotic manipulation (not to be confused with its very specific, and significantly more dangerous, sub-class of activity know as auto-erotic asphyxiation…check Michael Hutchence of INXS or David Carradine of Kill Bill fame for details). These challenges can de daunting to be sure. However, to me, the most daunting challenge of single life is mastery of folding a fitted sheet by oneself. This mere activity has been the bane of many a single. But, in the same vein, once one picks the lock of the secret and succeeds in producing a semblance of orderly folded material, as opposed to a balled mass, one understands and accepts that any other challenge can be met.

So, my ideal at the moment would be someone willing to be my partner in life. Someone who is excited about sharing experiences with their special person. Someone where there is mutual physical attraction – who still enjoys romantic and intimate time together. Someone who is open and excited to see more together than they have already seen alone – whether it is found on a trip to another country or just the next city down the road. Someone who has the passion to make me feel appreciated when I bring joy to them – and someone who has the strength to be honest with me even if it hurts. Someone who also finds that the new discoveries in life are found from new friends over a meal and drinks. Someone intelligent in conversation with me, and yet, confident during our quiet times together. Someone who wants to hold and be held. Someone who I will learn something new from even on my last day.

Image: https://goo.gl/images/qAYF2S

When it comes to investing in people —- invest in those who see you as a “first want” that they seek out frequently, not as a “last or most recent need” only occasionally.

Too often, we let the outcome of personal interactions be defined by the disappointments and disagreements that arise from such events.  The unfortunate truth is that the focus on these aspects contribute nada to our frame of mind, peace of mind or development of mind as we move forward.  Such an approach only serves to turn our ray of happiness destined for contentment into a terminated line segment.  In reality, the disappointments form such a minor and insignificant part of the overall interaction.  Mental and emotional concentration on these disappoints belies the true dilution effect that their small concentration has on the overall solution that was the discussion, revelation and insight.  Run the entire interaction through a filter – a mental and emotional centrifuge, distillery or simple gold pan.  Separating these unworthy aspects of the encounter out as mere by-product reveals that you are left with a more pure substrate, a higher quality and palatable drink of life and more golden nuggets than you could ever have imagined.

Image:  https://goo.gl/images/1xYHrM

Very few gifts are truly priceless – of these few, one of the greatest that can be given is a disappointing truth that releases you from the captivity of an unachievable possibility.

Image:  https://goo.gl/images/5izsgR

Sometimes I wonder if I claim too quickly the mantle of empath.  It may be more my ego and my perception that having empathetic feelings are a positive character trait that draws me to the claim.  However, I do feel (how many times will I use “feel” in a post about empathy), that I exhibit the foundations of empathetic thought often.  I have come to realize that such traits can be burdensome.  One is always trying to extract what others are feeling and motivated by by nothing else than your own perceptions of their actions (or inactions).  Is the silence I hear due to the fact that they are not interested or are they waiting for a more substantial move on my part?  This debate is further complicated by the personal fear or hope you as the empath have regarding the outcome.  You rotate in a spiral of action/inaction and indecision – the problem with a spiral is there is usually no forward motion that results.  At some point, you must let go of trying to interpret and let the silence stand for nothing more than what it is – silence.  Be receptive to hear, but quiet in your own voice.  If you keep yelling into a canyon waiting for an echo that never comes — maybe you are in the wrong canyon.

Image:  https://goo.gl/images/Gj6LAf

Ah, to be blessed in your life by those women who are rainbows

Never quite knowing from what source they spring from

Unable to see where they will wind up

But appreciative of the beauty and wonder they bring to your life

As they arc across your present and now

Momentarily possibly, but secured in a memory

Although it runs contrary to my normal “tie it to science” approach to emotions, Crash Davis’ character pretty much hits the same notes I would – just more from the gut than the head.  I am especially in tune with the “small of a woman’s back” and “long wet kisses”…….

Video link:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8W8GGdD6pc

Image:  https://goo.gl/images/FJ1nNf

It has come to me that the important decisions in life are made most difficult because we view them with an eye toward the pain of the past and fear of the future.

Image:  https://goo.gl/images/WpU7cg

Love without respect is only either self-serving lust or a selfish, convenient lie. Love with respect is like the promise the Dawn and Dusk make to the Day — always there at the beginning and end; in full, brilliant force when everything is clear and free of clouds; a steady, strong presence when skies are stormy and troubled, even though unseen behind the turmoil.  Without the Dawn and Dusk, the Day would wonder aimlessly, attempting to find its proper place.

Image:  https://goo.gl/images/QSKM1R

Have you ever found yourself in a conversation with someone where there were at least three end points to the conversation, yet it somehow continued on and you were pleased that it did so – when a seemingly stray comment on parting prompts an entire new line of conversation and sharing.  An engagement so easy and comfortable, that the slightest topic generates a desire to share in insight and experience.  A willingness on both sides to remain, just a little longer, to fully appreciate the insight of each.  If you come across such a situation – value those conversations, and more so, value those people!  In some ways, the way in which people interact with each other is like an assessment of the periodic table.  Some people are like inert element – they can pass among other atoms and have no interaction whatsoever.  They can collide and appear to come together for a period of time, but no real bond is formed and eventually they part.  Other people are like the slight reactive elements – looking for just enough of a bond to complete themselves but not concerned with the completion of the other person.  Stable bonds may be formed, but in doing so, they can be dominated by the slightly reactive element over the other – especially when formed with highly reactive elements.  Then there are those unique personalities that are these same highly reactive elements – willing to give up any proton or electron needed to form a bond, while maintaining their core neutrons at their center.  When two of these highly reactive personalities come in contact, the interchange can be significant and the bond lasting.  In most cases, the reaction that results is a strong, stable bond…..sometimes there may even be sparks.  The next time you find a conversation with someone continuing on a stray comment once you thought it was over, it may not be a case of afterthought…..in may be just electrons colliding looking to share a space in a bond.

https://goo.gl/images/vZdzsp

What happens when “good and comfortable” comes with the price of feeling held “captive” by fear, doubt and suspicion.  It is as if you live in a seemingly wonderful house full of many thing you desire — but not all.  Those items that would complete you lay outside.  Remaining in the house requires you to succumb to ongoing doubt that what remains in the house will be “enough” in the end.  Breaking past that doubt and fear provides access to the liberation of what lies beyond.

Image:  https://goo.gl/images/tkNAMJ

An embrace is a hug in which each party is actively engaged, yet, neither one can rationalize even one good reason to let go.

Image:  https://goo.gl/images/Mh9sfd

Find those people in your life that when you hug them the sensation lingers like a pleasant fragrance carried on the wind that always remains by your side.

Image:  https://goo.gl/images/hKQyNm

A life well-lived is a life abundant in memories.  A memory is merely a series of closely occurring moments fused together under the influence of the catalyst, connection.

Image:  https://goo.gl/images/8sWu8E

Much like The Police’s Synchronicity album which contained multiple tracks of the album title as songs, this will most likely just be the first of my contemplations on serendipity.  I start with a reference that I believe both captures the concept of serendipity and also provides additional insight into me.  The image above is from the movie Serendipity starring Kate Beckinsale and John Cusack.  The primary theme behind the plot is that experiences of seemingly happenstance could in fact be road signs pointing to our true destiny. The problem is that for most of us, we do not open ourselves up to guidance by serendipity along our journey.  It is not until we look back in reflection that we see that along the long path behind us there were opportunities – some subtle, some apparent, to make different decisions that would have affected where our destination would be today.  However, either out of fear or stubbornness, we determined that we knew better how to shape our destiny.  By doing so, we expose ourselves to the risk of winding up with a life less than what it could have been.  It is only with the release of fear and pride that we can become sensitive to these opportunities and free ourselves to act upon them.  Serendipity is Destiny’s tour guide – be attentive and act accordingly…..

So now for something a little less deep…..from a personal standpoint, the above image and scene caused me to recognize something about myself.  The female form of exposed midriff, resplendent with sensual flat abdomen, has an infinitely greater passion-inducing effect on me than the most well-executed prostate massage.

https://goo.gl/images/kQNykU